While FitzGyver was gone it occured to me that a pie would be nice for dessert ... so I pulled some peaches and raspberries out of the freezer and whipped up a pie crust ( YES!! I can actually "whip up a pie crust" now! It only took me 58 years to figure it out *blush*) I put the pie in the oven and called FitzGyver and asked him to add some vanilla ice cream to the shopping list.
FitzGyver came home, put the groceries on the counter and stalked off to his man cave. Being a supposedly intuitive female I should have been alerted that something was wrong in Paradise at that moment, but I was in comfort food bliss ...
I started the roast and when FitzGyver came back in I asked if he would help prep the veggies to go with the roast ... which he did without any comment (I missed that black thundercloud hanging over his head ... I really need a refresher course in feminine intuition ).
An hour later the post roast was done ... and the mushroom gravy ... and the biscuits to go with it all ... comfort food heaven! And I called to FitzGyver that dinner was ready ... and HE EXPLODED!
Yes, dear reader, he exploded! He accused me of attempted "Murder By Pot Roast"! Now, you have to understand ... Mike has a high cholesterol problem (which is really NOT due to my cooking but to his unfortunate genetic inheritance from his ancestors). I've got great cholesterol genes (thanks Mom and Dad), but have really tried to change my cooking style to low fat and healthy for my husband's sake ... but I'd been sick ... really sick ... and I was craving some comfort food. So ...
Me: " What part of I said we'd have pot roast if he bought one was he missing here?"
FitzGyver: Something about fat and cholesterol ... a little bit garbled so I can't quote exactly (I really need to get a recorder for times like these).
Me: "You helped prep the veggies for the pot roast ... so what part of we were having pot roast for dinner did you miss? "
FitzGyver: "Blah, blah something ... expletive deleted." ... it was getting harder to make out his words at this point ... and I have to admit, by this time I was sitting down and enjoying my meal ... it was wonderful!
Me: "You know, I can fix you something besides the pot roast ... would you like a spinach salad?" At this point I was spooning up some of the pie and slathering it with vanilla ice cream ... ah, bliss!
FitzGyver: "Blah, blah, blah ..." ... something to the effect of the pot roast is there and now he can't help himself ... words to the effect of I was offering candy to a diabetic ...
And I thought to myself ... you bought the roast ... you helped cook the roast ... and NOW YOU SAY I'M TRYING TO KILL YOU WITH THE ROAST ???!!!
And I looked down at the bowl of pie and ice cream in my hands and ...
There was a reason why I was always the last person picked in school for the softball team ... I've got most of the peaches off the lighting fixtures and the cupboards ... still a little on the ceiling and I think I'm going to have to paint ... maybe sponge with something raspberry colored ...
*sigh*
PS. I did receive some rather lovely flowers ....
PPS. It will be a while before I cook another pot roast and post the recipe ... I'm sure you understand ...
Same conversation going on at our house. Only my husband was life-flighted out to the hospital on Sunday with his 4th heart attack...and it's my fault because I cook too many good/bad things. He's home and doing better and I'm throwing away the salt (I don't cook with salt...he pours it on).
ReplyDeleteHow many times I've wanted to throw something, anything, but didn't have it right to hand. You lucky woman! If Fitzgyver was my son Casey I would say he was being an ass because he was HUNGRY! (I would literally have to cram food in his mouth and shut him in a closet with more food for 10 minutes and then he was a human again.) Sheesh!
ReplyDeleteCan't.Stop.Laughing!
ReplyDeleteBeen there, done that, but in my case I threw the pancakes at him. It would have been much more enjoyable if the pancakes had syrup on them. Plain dry pancakes just didn't quite get my point across.
Let me just say that I am glad you are feeling better and hope you enjoyed the pot roast and some of the dessert.
ReplyDeleteI made cookies last weekend then was accused of attempting to pump him with too much sugar. Sigh. Is it MY fault that someone eats 5 cookies at a time instead of one?!? Just saying.
Food wars can be almost as hard on a marriage as money wars. My husband has a medical condition which requires quite a large daily regimen of medication. Unfortunately it does bad things to his appetite and he goes for long stretches at a time wanting to only eat one thing (which then changes to something else a month later). It is very challenging to keep him eating well and not to kill him when he says unkind things. (sigh)
ReplyDeleteFood wars are indeed not fun! Mike's metabolism turns almost anything he eats into bad cholesterol. Mine turns it into good cholesterol (on my last lab work they didn't even calculate my LDL because my HDL was over 100!). I do try very hard to watch what kind of fats I cook with and I don't use any added salt in my cooking. But ... every once in a while I do crave some comfort food ... it's not like I force feed him; there was the option of a nice spinach salad if he didn't want the roast. All is well in Paradise again, at least for now ... I made a nice, healthy stir fry last night ... but watch out! I'm making cheese and broccoli soup for dinner tonight (with a big salad on the side ; )
ReplyDelete